Clark Kent’s Rock and Roll Revue #004 Soap Opera 2 of 3 Feat. Fake Club


Fake Club

August 9th 2013 The Barfly (CLUB JUBILEE) Camden/Chalk Farm (London)


I’m at a gig alone. I’m not in solo mode though and it feels positively wrong to leave now. Hmmm, time to make new friends. Jeff Moh the ace photographer is here…perhaps The Dash are still around? I don’t see them or their affable manager, but I do bump into an old acquaintance – Aisha Mirza. This Oxford graduate/writer and musician has travelled to Camden to hear Fake Club and after a bit of catching up, Aisha, myself and her man-pal move down front.

DSC_6753Photo Credit: WildBlanket A.K.A

Fake Club’s "Over and Over" is a stand out track. The guitars are brazen and glam rocky – quite a deft use of Powerchords to illustrate the irrepressible idealism that youth take for granted. Such a hefty banquet of noise. This all-girl band know how to channel their frustration out into the face of their cheering all-age audience. Check out how to film teenage rebellion. This is how you fucking do it.

Over and Over

Go on, click on the link and watch these hyper women. Done it yet? Give em another listen whilst reading on… …Fake Club have an abundance of hormones that natural conversation won’t resolve. This puts my initial reservation to rest. They. Are. For. Real. The spikey almost psychedelic solo from Carmen Vandenberg is quite clear despite the rest of the instruments jostling for aural attention, and I can’t wait to hear this stuff online. And hey, if the musical accomplishment is not enough to be thankful for there’s lead singer Rosie Bones! She jumps up and down screams and shouts (always in tune), Not many a still moment from this firecracker of a human-being! Interaction with the audience is at a bare minimum but Rosie’s communication pours from her near gymnastic knee-up’s, her constant spins to the other members. She is intent on spontaneous combustion. Brilliant. Think Arctic Monkeys, in fact those northern lads appear to be a core influence here albeit with poppy female vox in place of Alex Turners cock-sure scowl. Interesting thing is, the P.R man looking out for these talented young ladies is called Alex Turner, not that you need to know that. Nor indeed is it relevant that the front woman is the daughter of a rather famous animal lover. Nope, and my sycophantic ‘your dad is awesome!’ comment sounds like a bad idea once it leaves my mouth. Note to self: must learn how to speak with famous people’s offspring better. The lady has character though and smiles through her thank you as though she’s never heard such a compliment before. What character. What a talent.


Rosie on knees in front of guitarist Carmen V - Photo Credit: WildBlanket A.K.A

"Do What You Gotta Do" doesn’t quite live up to the promise of the bluesy sludge rock verse. I think of that Glee show that I’ve been avoiding and the chorus lyrics are a little too on the nose for me. There is a track by Billie Piper (yeah remember when she sang?) called "Because We Want To." I hear too much of that here. A matter of taste then. Considering I’m so not their target audience, they’ve done a superb job of getting me to write about them. 

Oh and I HAVE to mention "Beauty Queen." The song is decidedly Franz Ferdinand in its jauntiness. I think it has potential to make the Radio One playlist due to the chirpy chorus, the Rock and Roll attitude not being too much for ears more accustomed to straight pop acts. Sooooo good to hear a girl band singing lyrics that pointedly declare that beauty is no signifier of perfection. Society needs more songs like this from bands that despite their good looks REFUSE to take the easy Miley Cyrus/Rhianna/Rita Ora route.

The lights are coming up and I’m quite satiated. Tonight was a rather refreshing exercise in dealing with each band as its own entity rather than a counter on a life-sized band edition of Monopoly!

It’s amazing how events and relationships outside the music inform our understanding and appreciation of our favourite bands. Knowing Cobain was into The Pixies worked out well for me because not only did I get into another great band, I was able to fill in a topographical blank in my mapping out of Kurt’s genius. I guess part of my job description is to provide a balance to the musical art and the backstory that helps birth it.

So Gypsies, scene building is no bad thing, not if done well, yes? The jury is still out on that one. Feel free to throw your hat in the ring. For now, I’ll keep rolling out the odd glob of mythos to deliver bands the attention reserved for those acts, those neutered guinea-pigs that spin the cogs of a dying industry. Me? Cynical? Never.

Fake Club are: Rosie Bones - vocals Aicha Djidjelli - drums Carmen Vandenberg - lead guitar Chloe Askew - rhythm guitar Holly – bass

Oh, and check out Fake Club T.V. This band have their ear to the ground and the media in the crosshairs.

Next time in Clark Kent’s Rock and Roll Revue: 1) How to use TWO drummers in your band effectively 2) Girl fights on the night bus home with police involvement/social commentary linking it back to tonight’s stand out act: THE DOGBONES 3) How career setbacks can lead to artistic success.

To be concluded…